Affairs of the Heart
by shadowWizz
Summary: Their friendship, the internal turmoil and the struggles towards rebuilding their relationship. Set after the night which Yaya had kissed Hikari. Warning: Monologue galore, yuri themes. No flames, please R&R.


**Affairs of the Heart**  
**Summary:** Their friendship, the internal turmoil and the struggles towards rebuilding their relationship… Set after the night which Yaya had kissed Hikari.

**First Half:** Yaya x Hikari - These 2 need to do something about their feelings and stop avoiding each other.

**A/N:** Monologue galore. It's to get a grasp of what the characters are feeling / thinking. Timeline of the story starts from that night and last throughout the Etoile selection.

Plus, I don't own anything of Strawberry Panic.

* * *

**  
Yaya's POV**

The words 'Friend' & 'Trust' are the basis for a relationship of any kind to start happening.  
... and I no doubt had just destroyed something very important in the growth of this friendship of mine.

_A moment's folly. _  
The rash decision I made which caused devastating results... which destroyed everything I had build, which smashed the foundation of the relationship into dust… never allowing any firm structure to be ever built upon it again.

_I should never have kissed her that night. _  
The days which went by after that fateful event felt like years to me. Nothing ever feels the same again. Looking at her pained expression is like having someone driving a stake through my heart. I was in pain. Not from any bodily wounds, but from the expression which she puts on her face every time our eyes meet. I'm not sure how many days went by with me not being able to look at her straight in the face. All I know was that the happy times we once shared felt like they had occurred a decade ago.

_Tired of pretending._  
I can't stand the look on Hikari's face anymore. That look… I need to find a way to avoid it. I need to disappear, I just have to. I can't handle this pressure any further.  
That expression of fear from who I once had and _still_ treasure the most. The subtle displays of fear is depleting my soul, slowly freezing my emotions and making my world come to a stop.

_Will it ever move again?_

**  
Hikari's POV**

_The kiss. _  
All that is going through my mind now is that kiss that Yaya gave me. Each time I look at her, the image is the only thing that comes up to mind. It's disturbing. Everything has suddenly become wrong. Everything has turned into a mess. I have no idea what to think of now.

_Amane & Yaya. _  
The 2 who I trust the most. The 2 who I don't want to hurt the most.  
Why did it have to come to this? I have already made my choice, but something is stopping me from revealing it.

_Friendships and Relationships._  
I have to do something. Otherwise it will cause problems not just to me but to everyone. I'll have to make up my mind and speak to Yaya about this. She cannot keep on avoiding me forever. It hurts for me to see her act like it's fine when it's not. I suppose I can't delay this any further.

_It's either now or never._

**  
Tsubomi's POV**

What in the world happened? First they were the best of friends and now... barely even speaking to each other. Hikari – sempai and Yaya – sempai are all acting weird. At least Hikari – sempai is looking much better. Yaya – sempai looks like she's trying to make herself disappear into thin air.

_Yaya – sempai_  
Hikari – sempai has made her move. Yaya – sempai has a broken heart. Doesn't anyone realize that her soul is crying out for someone? Can somebody piece back the broken heart? The person who can do this is no longer able to do it. She needs someone. Can somebody do something about it? Yaya – sempai looks likes she's going to disappear anytime. Somebody, please do something, please ease her crying soul.

_The sickening wait_  
Watching Yaya – sempai float around the school compound kills me. The person who once had the best smiles has now become one with none. Something must be done about it. I have to do something about it. I can't wait for someone to do it anymore. She's slowly fading away. No one else is noticing it but me… Something has to be done, but what? What can I do for her? All I can do is to be at her side, but I can't possibly ease her pain…

_Then again, it won't hurt trying._

* * *

**  
TBC - Second Half:**  
Tsubomi needs to get Yaya back to the world of the living. Can she succeed? Will Yaya be able to pull through and finally accept Hikari's choice? Can she move on?

**A/N:** I have a bad habit of writing during late at nights and stumbling into writer's block easily... This will be my first fic with chapters and I hope I'll be able to get through it. Anywayz, juz a head's up. This fic will probably end around the next chapter, lesser monologue, but won't be updated any time soon unless i get a fresh wave of ideas...


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